Because I Had Children

When I was a younger mother and my children were much smaller, I had several people regularly tell me they thought I had too many activities going on with each of my children.  I felt like I had everything under control, but apparently I looked like I didn't.  I felt like I was able to get everything in; my church calling, my homemaking responsibilities, volunteer activities, "me" time, plus get my kids to their piano lessons, sports practices and other extracurricular events.  I never once felt like I had taken on too much.  But, I felt like I was constantly having to stand up for myself and prove that I was doing it all and I was doing it just fine.  Never once did I feel overworked or stressed out to the point that I couldn't handle my hectic schedule.  (OK, let's be honest, I had my days, but they were relatively few and far between.) Until this summer happened. I have never felt so overworked and exhausted as I have the last two months.  It ac...

Sometimes I think my children are just really farm animals by the way they graze all day in and out of my kitchen.  The thought of wanting to eat at all times of the day is making me crazy.  I know most of the time it is just pure boredom.  Not because there isn't a million things to do around here, but because sometimes we are just lazy. I realize that I may have contributed to the problem.  When I was in school, there was a lot of times when I said to them, "feed yourselves, I have a paper due in two hours and I just started."  Yes, we ate a ton of pre-packaged food, cold cereal and ramen the last few years.  Gross.  But it was mostly my fault that we got into some bad habits. I will also admit that I sit at this computer and do NOTHING, a lot of the time now.  Yes, I'm checking my e-mails for the booster club stuff that needs done, sometimes I am writing that awe-inspiring blog post, working on my book or editing something for a fellow writ...

I wish I knew where I heard this first, but it was many years ago when my older ones were young.  I'd like to give credit where it is due, but I simply cannot remember. This is the rule of thumb I rely on when my children ask me if they can do something. Always say yes unless you have a good reason to say no. It has worked for me all these years that I thought I would share it with you.  It makes it so much easier when they ask me for permission to do something when both of us know the answer is yes unless I have an excellent reason to deny them. I want my kids to experience anything and everything they can in this life.  I don't want them to be sheltered or under-privileged.  I want them to do things that freak them out (in a good way) and that challenge them to work hard and get what they want. I will give you some actual examples so that you know what I am talking about: Sometimes the littlest ones come to me with those sweet...

I have a problem with becoming frustrated easily.  Some of it is caused by things not getting done in a timely manner by my family, some of it by school administration/teachers, and some of it by just plain old dumb people.  The reality is that I choose how to react to those situations. I have decided that the most effective way to deal with these problems is to keep calm.  I have a "10" rule.  Depending on the circumstance, I either count to 10, wait 10 hours or even 10 days.  Each case is different. If my children are the frustration, I count to 10 before I explode (or at least I try to remember to do that).  I'm not perfect, but generally by the time I slowly count to 10, some of the red hot fire of the situation has been diffused and I am able to think in my head the best possible solution to my frustration.  I can't change who my children are, but I can certainly be responsible for myself and how I respond to those triggers especially with tho...