Respect

"R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Find out what it means to me." - Aretha Franklin

"You don't have to find out, I'll tell you what respect means to me." -Stacy Johnson

There's a part of me that longs for the days when my parents had me call anyone older than me by Mr or Mrs., Aunt or Uncle (even if they were a distant cousin), Coach, Bishop, Your Honor, etc. 

When I address my students, I expect them to refer to me as Mrs. Johnson or Mrs. J. I even mention it to them when they call me on the phone, "Hello, this is Mrs. Johnson" or when I sign my email, it's "Mrs. J" I deserve that. I'm still boggled when a student will get on a google meet and say, "Hello Stacy!" My brain is like, "You are 15 years old!" I've earned this title of respect.

I called all adults older than me at church with the title of Sister or Brother in front of their last name. That's just what we did. When Iwas an adult, I remember playing on a Tuesday night recreational volleyball team with some of those ladies that I grew up with (my mom's friends). I kept calling them Sister Jones or Sister Smith because that's what I did. One time, one of them finally said I could call them by their first name but in my heart, I couldn't do it for two reasons; 1 - I didn't know their first name, lol and 2 - I had too much respect for them to do it. 

I know that we are a much more casual society than we were when I was a kid. I get that. I have to wonder if that's part of the entitled generation, feeling like they don't have to show this simple sign of respect. I also realize that even talking about this shows my age. I'm old. I've earned this moment so let me be. 

If you are younger than me, you are not my equal. If I am younger than you,  I am not your equal. Now that I'm 50, I finally feel like there are some adults that I attend church with that I can call by their first name. There aren't many and we have to be pretty close for me to do that. It's because I respect you. 

I'm grateful for the students and athletes I've known over the years who have shown me this respect. Do I look down on those that have become adults and started calling me Stacy? Do I feel blatantly disrespected? Of course not, but it sometimes stops me in my tracks when it happens and I chuckle at you in my head and I move on with my life.