Because I Had Children

I knew this day would come but I didn't anticipate how hard it would be to actually let you go. I do want to thank you for sticking with us as long as you could because being the two oldest of eight cannot be an easy thing. Knowing I am losing 25% of my kids at one time is hard on my heart so tread lightly. There are so many things I hope I have taught you and maybe I'm a little scared that I didn't. Just in case I didn't cover something, here are a few reminders before you go: 1 - Pay with cash as often as possible. You need a house to live in, a vehicle to drive and an education. You don't need new couches, expensive clothing or dinner out a 12% interest rate. Pay your tithing. Everything we have came from the Lord, all he asks is 10%. Be wise and always pay your debts on time. 2 - Serve others. You are entering a period of your life where you only have to be responsible for one person - YOU. You may have to deal with roommates or co-workers but it will be n...

I'm a wimp. I'm not a fan of natural childbirth. I joke that with baby #8 my epidural didn't work and that's why I'm never having another child again, ha ha. The truth is that the epidural man was my best friend for many years. When I went into labor, he was the first person we called. (Not really, but close.) I'm a huge fan of modern medicine. But, when I have a headache, I try drinking water, I suck on peppermint, I close my eyes for 15 minutes or so, etc. But if that doesn't do the trick, tylenol here I come. When I got nausea during pregnancy, I tried  eating crackers, sipping ginger ale, sucking on ginger, I even bought sea bands to wear on my wrists, etc. When that didn't work, I turned to my trusty Zofran to get through my day. I like to think I have a good balance between "natural" remedies and modern medicine. I'm thankful for both and this is why. When my daughter turned three, we started potty training. It was rough but ...

Circa 1997 My hands were full  "They grow up so fast, in the blink of an eye," they said. I still resent those people who said it would go by so fast and I should cherish them while they are still young. Really? I had six kids under the age of 11 at one point, there was very little about my life that I cherished except maybe date night without the kids. Cherish the stinky diapers, the vomit, the bed wetting, the whining, the dirty laundry that truly never ended, the sticky kitchen floor and towels dropped on the linoleum in the bathroom? Let's not forget the nausea, sciatica and discomfort of being pregnant for so many years and then having a baby stuck to my boob 24/7 for sustenance. What about those comatose days because the baby didn't sleep well during the night but the toddler was up at 6am as usual. Yeah...I don't think so. Circa 2003 Survival Mode Life is now way more fast paced than I could have envisioned and I'm seeing that I missed out on...

Update: As of 10/31/2013, our team goal has been met and exceeded. We are so grateful for all the support that has been given to our team. If you still feel like you want to sponsor a special needs squad, there are Pop Warner leagues all over the country, please follow the link below to our national website and consider searching for a team in your local area. We will always need sponsors so keep us in mind for next year as well. In the last week, I have already heard from three new girls who want to join our squad for next year so our need will be even greater if we are invited to compete at the Regional level again. We want every child with special needs to have the chance to participate. Again, thank you for all your support. _____________________________________________________________ I have belonged to many organizations, specifically those dealing with coaching youth sports. But, the best one I've worked with EVER, is Pop Warner Football and Cheer. My husband and I hav...

Please tell me you recognize that iconic phrase from Princess Bride movie?!?! The subject of marriage has been on my mind for quite some time now.  Well, let's be honest, I met Ben when I was 17 so it has been on my mind for a SUPER long time.  This anniversary means we will have been married for 22 whole years.  When we had been married a short time, I told Ben I had never loved another boy as long as I had loved him.  He thought I was being corny.  OK, I was. Several months ago he found several of the letters I had written to him while he was serving a mission for our church. In one of them I had answered his question as to if I remembered the first time he told me he loved me.  It brought back such sweet memories of me sitting in the driver seat of my red chevy pickup, my body turned facing him as I was getting ready to head home.  He kissed me and then he said it.  I replied back that I loved him too. I still feel weak in my knees and I ge...

Less than a week from the end of the year, the kids at our local high school instigated a food fight. Several kids were suspended and were required to take their finals after school and several seniors were not allowed to walk at graduation (on the condition that they were eligible in the first place). It was on the news several times that night and it was all over Twitter and Facebook. This is big news to our community and devastating to our already struggling school.  A lot of people are upset with the way the administration handled the consequences. I get it. I'd be mad too if I had heard that my kid wasn't graduating because he was part of a food fight. I want to make it clear that while I think the punishment doesn't quite fit the crime, what is really bothering me is the childish behavior on behalf of grown adults who have NO IDEA WHAT THE ENTIRE STORY REALLY IS. I suspect only the principal and parents really know both sides.  That being said, why do we all feel li...

I love a good parenting book.  “But this is a football book?” you argue.  Why yes, it is.  And it is a WONDERFUL resource on how to run a family too!! While Bronco isn’t the author of the book, he assisted them in putting together how to build a successful team by sharing the things he has done during his career as BYU head football coach.  Much of what he learned came from the mentoring of author Paul Gustavson and can be applied to managing a business, coaching a team or running a household.   Bronco’s approach uses the analogy of five smooth stones, just like the ones that David used in the Bible to slay Goliath.  The chapters go in depth on how to apply these principles. Smooth Stone #1 – Organizations Can Craft a Sustainable Competitive Advantage through Differentiation Smooth Stone #2 – Organizations Are Perfectly Designed to Get the Results That They Get Smooth Stone #3 – Organizations Are Made Up of Business Processes, and N...

On a busy Thursday afternoon, my husband got a phone call from our 14 year old who called to say he had been in a fight. After making sure he was all right, we listened as he told his side of the story. He had been hit from behind and quickly turned around with his fists up to defend himself. Luckily, nothing else happened. A teacher saw the whole thing and took them both to the office to meet with the principal. My son was allowed to go back to class and the other child was given a three-day suspension.   When I figured out the other boy was my friend’s son, I immediately wanted to call and talk about it but we were on our way out of town. I decided to go with my "10 rule" ( see that post here ) before making the call.  I wasn't really mad because it turns out my son had been teasing this kid for quite a while. A few years to be exact...and I had no idea. How is it that a good parent, like me, doesn't know her son is being a "bully" at school?...

I recently had dinner with three wonderful friends I met while attending ASU.  We are all members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, we each hold a batchelor’s degree or better and we all are mothers and were or are married for more than ten years.  The thing that makes us different is that two of these women are divorced.  One of them I have only known since after her divorce.  She is beautiful, intelligent and devoted and among her other talents.  She has always been (to me), happy and content with the direction her life is going.  That isn’t to say it has been easy, but where she is today is more peaceful than when she was married. My other friend has only been divorced for a few months.  She has always been beautiful, intelligent, devoted and insightful but only until recently did she seem happy like my other friend. Her countenance had significantly changed and the light was shining from her like I hadn't seen before. As...

We took the kids to the Easter Pageant.  For more information on that, click here .  Our 12 year old daughter Katy was able to invite a non member friend to go with us.  It is a pageant about the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.  It is fabulous and I have fond memories of going as a child. We stopped and got Ned's Krazy Subs  "to go" and we took our blankets and ate our dinner picnic style on the lawn of the temple.  We always sit on the lawn, I think it is more intimate and personal to be huddled together with my family. My babies, Anny age 4 and Derek age 3 would not stop asking me questions all throughout the performance.  I'm glad they have a basic knowledge of Jesus Christ but at times I wanted them to just stop talking so I could enjoy it in peace but who tells their kids to be quiet and stop asking questions about Jesus?  For reals.  Anyway, I tried to be patient. When Jesus was hanging on the cross, I thought Anny w...

I posted earlier this month about how to write an acrostic poem .  Today I learned from my author friend Theresa how to write a cinquain poem.  It really took me back to my elementary school days and I loved it.  Find her post  here on how to write one and then try it out yourself.  I'd love to see what you come up with.  Here's a few of mine: Brothers Incredible Bond Making Moments Count Setting a good example Forever Missionary Service, Exhausted Walking, Praying, Teaching Teaching others about Christ Vance Sleepy Always Needs Nap Searching for ways to cope Ending up at the pop store Stacy So let me see what you come up with!!

I love my job as a writer for The Beehive .  I have met some pretty awesome individuals over the years as I have done interviews.  I have decided my favorite people to write about are the youth.  I like to get people excited about the future generation and what they have to offer. My latest article is about Chy Johnson (no relation), who is a special needs student at a nearby high school who was struggling with bullies.  You can read it here . The one thing that I like about my blog is that I can express my opinion where in the article I cannot.  What I wish I could have said (besides how awesome I think these boys are), is that I wish this didn't have to be such a unique story...I wish this was just an every day, run of the mill news article we watched on the television every single day.  Why is it so sensational to hear that a boy and his teammates were nice to this girl who was being bullied?  I would like to think that this happens every day al...

I feel like this could be its own series in itself but suffice it to say that money is a part of keeping our homes, is it not? I'm not a professional on this topic, I can hardly balance my own checkbook, let alone give advice.  I live paycheck to paycheck, sometimes stretch myself further than I should and waste money on things that have very little lasting value...like many people I know. But there is one thing I do know:  When I start spending more than is coming in, the problems start. Budgeting is key. Because I'm horrible about writing checks and not remembering to log them, I stopped writing checks.  I am on a strict cash only basis and I'm not always as vigilant as I ought to, but I'm getting better.  I find that I spend less, I am more careful about my purchases and I have learned how to say no to lots of extra things that don't have lasting value (except for maybe my diet pepsi splurges).  This works for me. There are lots of wonderful resources...

As part of the topic of House of Order, House of God explained in my last post, one of the things we focused on was how to manage the many things that distract us.  There are lots, aren't there?  Books, television, computer, cleaning up messes, breaking up fights, lunch with friends, hobbies, sexy  husbands (ha ha), and a myriad of specific things that could fall into any of those categories. This is part of my job ?  I say yes, guilt free. To start off, I would argue that things like cleaning up messes, breaking up fights, making lunch, taking care of the kids, etc. fall into the category I like to think of as part of my "job" as a keeper of the house.  If I look at it that way, then I don't see them as a waste of my time or effort in keeping my house, I see it as something that I am responsible for taking care of (or at least one of the parental units is responsible).  So, when I look at the other things, that is where I find my problems lie... I ...

I was asked to give a presentation at our stake women's conference last weekend.  I stressed about it and worried about it for several weeks.  I didn't sleep (I wish I hadn't eaten but I did the opposite), I couldn't relax or really think about anything else.  I'm sure my friends were sick of me asking them what they thought on the topic.  The truth of it was...I didn't feel worthy to address this topic. House of Order, House of God My friends and family are all laughing pretty good right about now.  I'm not a great housekeeper.  End of story.  And, to top it off, most of the time I'm not that worried about it ever getting clean.  So, how am I going to talk to a group of 300 or so women about House of Order, House of God?  And then it dawned on me.  I'm doing the best job that I can do for ME and MY family, so that's what I tried to convey. We talked about some of the reasons we don't have perfect homes.  Some of us haven't e...

I have a lot to say.  I have these things all stuck in my head and they need to come out.  It isn't necessarily because I think anyone else needs to read or hear it, but if I don't write about it, it stays stuck there.  It causes me to lose sleep and to be distracted when I'm awake so I write. I belong to a fabulous group of LDS writers called ANWA (American Night Writers Association).  I have been a member for over ten years now and have appreciated the things I have learned and accomplished.  It is through this group that I found an outlet for the crazy stuff inside my head and how to get it out there. I don't write a lot of stuff for the general public, but I do write a lot.  I write for a newspaper called The Beehive (you can read my latest article here ), I have been published in our local Independent paper, I am on Facebook more than necessary and I blog.  I even wrote a fictional story a while back that needs some serious editing. Wri...

I love technology (but maybe not as much as Ben).  We are hooked up to the internet so many ways at  our house including phones, ipad, computers and satellite t.v.  I have some awesome apps on my phone that help me use my brain like Words with Friends and Ruzzle.  I love listening to music without too much commercial interruption by using Pandora, I have the scriptures and other gospel resources at my fingertips with LDS Tools, Gospel Library, Mormon Channel and Indexing.  I can read from my favorite books while sitting in my car waiting for children to be picked up by using my Kindle, Deseret Bookshelf, or listening through Audible.  I take pictures of my kids and upload them to Instagram and Facebook with one click of a button and I rarely miss an e-mail because I get that on my phone too.  My State Farm Pocket Agent saved me from getting a ticket the other day because of no proof of insurance and I save money at Hobby Lobby with my coupon app. ...

"When a couple have commenced a marriage based upon reasonable standards, no combination of power can destroy that marriage except the power within either or both of the spouses themselves; and they must assume the responsibility generally. Other people and agencies may influence for good or bad; financial, social, political, and other situations may seem to have a bearing. But the marriage depends first and always on the two spouses, who can always make their marriage successful and happy if they are determined, unselfish, and righteous. The formula is simple; the ingredients are few, though there are many amplifications of each. First, there must be the proper approach toward marriage, which contemplates the selection of a spouse who reaches as nearly as possible the pinnacle of perfection in all the matters that are of importance to the individuals. Then those two parties must come to the altar in the temple realizing that they must work hard toward this successful join...

I'm two weeks into the process of potty training child #8.  I think my reward for even having that many children is that the last two should have been born potty trained!  But, so far so good.  I was going to work on it the first week the kids went back to school but Derek was so sick and the antibiotics gave him the runs so I gave up on that after day 2. Once he was feeling better, we started over.  He loves wearing his cute little boy underwear (he makes it clear that he doesn't wear panties like his sister).  To keep him from poop accidents, I told him if he pooped on Spiderman, he will turn into The Incredible Hulk and that would be too scary. (I'm not sure this has really been effective.)  I also have been taking this time to talk about body parts and why we need to keep them covered.  It makes for the start of good conversations about who can touch down there and why they would need to, like for cleaning up after an accident or the Doctor when ...