Tuesday, December 27, 2011

It is who I am and frankly, I don't want to change

As I have been getting "older," several times over the last few years, I have wanted to have a makeover of sorts, you know, buy a few new outfits, wear makeup more often, do my hair every day.  I do good for a few weeks and then I sorta revert back to the "old" me.  I get it in my head that I need to act my age better, or dress the part of a 40 year old.  It isn't that I feel old or even think I need to wear old people clothes, that's not my point.  I just feel like I dress like a 13 year old boy because I wear tennis shoes and t-shirts every day, just like I did in the 8th grade.

When I was in the 9th grade, I tried a little harder and it was fortunate that on the days that I cheered for football, we had to wear our "game day" clothes and when I played basketball and ran track, we had to dress up for school on those days.

When I was in high school, I loved to go shopping at the thrift stores and buy my clothes there.  My friend Renee was so good at helping me get pieces that would look cute together and we paid practically nothing for our clothes.

I remember when I had my job at the credit union and Vance was small.  We were broke most of the time and because I had just given birth, I wore a lot of pants with elastic waistbands (gasp).  My boss had to pull me aside once and tell me I needed to dress it up better because I was starting to get a bit too casual.  I remember wearing the same skirt and blouse twice that week for lack of clothes.  I didn't have money, I worked full time, and I was a mom the rest of the time.  I was too tired to shop.

As I had more and more kids, I found the stretchy pants thing really worked for me.  I wore Ben's t-shirts because they were comfortable when I was big and pregnant and then when I was nursing.  I was always doing one or the other it seems for about 12 years.  When the kids were little, I spent my time shopping for them and if there was money left over (which there rarely was), I was too tired to go shopping for myself.

I've moved away from the sweatpants era when they finally put lycra in my jeans, it's like the best of both worlds now.  When I'm a grandma, I'm certain that I will be wearing the same thing.  (I hope that makes me a cool grandma, not a dorky one.)

My point is, that as I have not just gotten older, but I have also come to the realization that this is who I am.  I am the queen of casual.  When I put on a dress and heels, I think I look good, but I am just not comfortable and feel like I am playing dress up.  I know it is all in my head, but I just want to put it out there that I'm done worrying about wanting to "look the part" of whomever I thought I needed to be.  I am me and I like it.

I also have a pretty awesome t-shirt collection that any teenager would be proud of.


  1. just found your blog from Mega Families.. reading this post sounds alot like me, except seems most days, I have pj's on LOL..

    I love the photo in your header.. What a perfect image of a large family photo shoot!

  2. You are really good at being you...that's why we all love you.

  3. This is my first visit to your page and I love the picture of your family. It really does show how all the children have different personalities. I notice that so much with my children also. Even my Twins are so different from each other.

  4. Nicole - If you are still wearing p.j.'s after 10am, they are considered casual wear, that is my official policy.